A TERRIBLE KINDNESS et al

Lurking at the edge of the Norwegian wood 

I cower from my evil mother.

Manipulative, domineering, demeaning.

The years of her house rules seemed interminable.

How true; at the seaside nobody hears you scream.

Believe me, I tried!

Like many I learnt to merely exist

Learnt that in the shadows we breathe.

My escape was a winding road

No dash to a happy place

Rather the sheltering of my soul.

‘Life is like a bowl of cherries, Maggie,’ 

my one and only friend told me.

‘That’s the problem, we have no cherries,’

I snapped back.

Poor Amy, she’d tried. She nearly succeeded.

Books became my saviour.

The lilac notebook in the lost bookshop, 

Filled with wise musings and inspiration was

a driving force for my escape.

Then came Leo.

I discovered him between maps and politics

A gentle invitation of coffee followed.

He saw me before I saw myself.

Never believe the lies we told, he said.

So many lies I told myself.

His friendship was a terrible kindness

One that crushed my world, the terrifying duality of my mother and I.

Did I tell you, she was evil?

The visit to the cafe was more than coffee, it was my freedom.

The vanishing of Margaret Small, the old me, was easy.

Learning to walk in someone else’s shoes as Maggie Stolz,  finding my true self, was gruelling.

It was from here where the story starts, where my life truly began.

In the ensuing days, months and years, I abandoned the family tree.

I step out of the darkness of the trees and at last realise there is a light that never goes out – the light within me.

In the five years since meeting Leo I am at last celebrating this beautiful life!

© Annika Perry, January 2024

The above story celebrates some of the 80 books I read in 2023 and it’s fun to create a short narrative featuring a few of the titles. The book titles included are in the list below.

  • Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami
  • My Evil Mother by Margaret Atwood
  • House Rules by Jodi Picoult
  • At The Seaside Nobody Hears You Scream by Janet Gogerty
  • The Shadows We Breathe by Sarah Brentyn
  • A Winding Road by Miriam Hurdle
  • Happy Place by Emily Henry
  • The Sheltering by Khaya Ronkainen
  • Life is Like a Bowl of Cherries by Sally Cronin
  • The Lilac Notebook by Carol Notebook
  • The Lost Bookshop by Evie Woods
  • The Lies We Told by Diana Chamberlain
  • A Terrible Kindness by Jo Browning Wroe
  • More than Coffee by Lauren Scott
  • The Vanishing of Margaret Small by Neil Alexander 
  • In Someone Else’s Shoes by Jojo Moyes
  • Where The Story Starts by Imogen Clark
  • The Family Tree by Sairish Hussain
  • In The Five Years by Rebecca Serle
  • There is Light the Never Goes out by David M Barnett
  • This Beautiful Life by Katie Marsh

Below are images of all the books I’ve had the joy of reading last year! I just made it over the finishing line of the Goodreads Reading Challenge in 2023 and this year I am reducing my sights to 52 books! 

Wishing you all a New Year blessed with good health, happiness and light – may 2024 be filled with creativity!

148 thoughts on “A TERRIBLE KINDNESS et al

    1. Janet, it has been a rich year of books and I loved reading so many, including yours! Glad you saw it featured here and I wrote a review at the time on Amazon etc. Glad you came across some old friends in the book titles & Happy Reading!

      1. Thanks so much for Annika for your great review, sorry I missed it in the autumn, I shall share it on my next blog. So glad you enjoyed my approach. My collection ‘Someone Somewhere’ includes two novellas, the inside story of the robot and the love story across time linked to the novel.

  1. Beautiful short poetic-like story you’ve written with a couple of the titles of books you’ve read Annika!✨ Happy reading this year 2024 🎉 and I hope you’ll achieve your reading goal again, no matter that you brought the amount back to 52. I’ve got the exact same amount and will read hopefully more, but nice to read a book a week at least as a try.
    Loves from Sophie

    1. Sophie, it’s wonderful you enjoyed the poetic story and it was fun weaving in about twenty of the eighty books I read last year! Snap! Yes, I thought a book a week sounded more manageable and I have many other things I want to focus on this year as well! Lovely to share about books and I look forward to popping over to your blog! Happy Reading! 😀📚

  2. Oh my,, How creative was that muse, to create such a compelling little story out of all of those book titles shows more than talent Annika… Well done on writing that, and for reading all of those books…
    I think I may have got through half a dozen all year.. 🙂

    But being focused in on what ever form that be, for you its reading and writing, for me its creating with my needles and brushes… 🙂 It takes us out of the chaotic mess we see unfurling in the outer-world right now…

    Wishing you a wonderful New Year Annika. and may it be just as creative and abundant in every way possible xx

    1. Sue, thank you for your beautiful words and reflections. Reading and writing are my two passions in life and I thoroughly enjoy weaving them together in this short piece here.

      How true, artistic and creative activity, whatever its form, allows us that inner peace for creativity and optimism in a world ever more disturbed and disturbing.

      I am in awe of your painting and craft work – when I was younger my sewing was worse than abysmal and the teacher agreed with my mother that she didn’t need to fork out for yet more material for something I’d fail to finish! 😀 Even my grandmother despaired of me with this regard but I later saw she’d saved all the stories I’d written as young (&which my mother had translated and sent to her.)

      Happy Creating and for us all helping to make that little difference! Hugs xx ❤️

      1. Thank you Annika, we each have our own unique skills and your story telling is wonderful.
        How lovely your mum sent your stories to her, taking the time to translate so she could read them.
        Which tells me even as a child your writing and stories were too good not to share xx
        💕💕💕

  3. Impressive! Annika, I noticed you’ve read quite a few books. I’m curious, which tool did you use to create the collection of book covers you’ve read in 2023? I’d like to make a similar collage for myself.

    1. Ambika, the presentation of the books is actually quite simple and I didn’t use any special tools. Rather took screenshots of the books as they appear on my goodreads challenge page, a set of ten for each screenshot and then shared as a gallery here. I’m glad it turned out this well. Thank you for reading and your interest,

  4. Very nice indeed Annika. I particularly like the verse form you made it into. I’m unfamiliar with this reading challenge. Can you pick which titles to read yourself?
    Anyway, well done, wishing you all the best (including wonderful books) for 2024!

    1. Many thanks, Chris and so glad you liked the format – it seemed to choose itself!😀 I choose the books which I read last year and which ones to include here – I was inspired by another blogger friend who has been writing these for a number of year. Haha! Yes, I’ve already read some great books this year – one for NetGalley and posting review tomorrow. Wishing you a good start to 2024!

  5. This is an ingenious way to write about the books you read while sharing the depth and scope of your reading last year. I read none of the books that you did, you are an inspiration. Happy New Year!

  6. WOW. What a sad and intense and powerful story from the titles of books you read in 2023. You beat me to it this year, Annika. Not sure I can (should?) follow up after this. Isn’t it fun, though, writing a story using book titles. I find it gives us a path, a structure, to follow. Glad this story had a good ending. Happiest of New Years to you, my friend. ❤

    1. My friend, I’ve been checking up on your blog and waiting for your post of your books! After all, Pam, you’re the one who inspired me to write these! Of course, you should write one and I can’t wait to read it. It is a lot of fun to write and I’m always amazed how they seem to write themselves once the first sentence or two and books are in place. Have you ever used this as a writing prompt for your students? I bet it would be very popular! Hope all is well with you and wishing you a year filled with creativity, books and always writing! hugs xx❤️

      1. Well, my fingers are polishing off the back of my shoulder if I inspired you to write this post! 🙂 I will work on it this week and hope for my Friday blog. Thank you so much and much love.

  7. Happy New Year, Annika! What a clever way to present all the books you’ve read this past year- I loved your story! You’ve got some good ones listed there and some on my list. I only read about 10 books this year, so I hope to read many more in 2024. I hope you are doing well and are happy! I wish you only the best for the year ahead. May it be filled with wonder, magic, good health, and love. 🥂❤️

    1. Tanya, thank you so much and that means a lot! It was fun to revisit the books via the story and weave some titles into the story. I’m lucky to have the time to read so much (not so lucky with sleepless nights when I also turn to read!). I’ve popped by your blog a few times and hope you are doing okay. Wishing you all the best for 2024, may it be kind to you and full of adventures and discovery. hugs xx ❤️

      1. I’m in Italy, Annika, and am doing well! The months since my last post did not go as planned, the universe brought more heartache, but I was determined to move through it and forward. That’s all we can do, right? I think 2024 has started off pretty well, with Paris and Rome and now Lecce. I’m one lucky duck. I hope to post something soon! Take good care and I’m sending lots of hugs right back. ❤️

  8. Annika, this is so creative and compelling! What a wonderful way to list the books you read last year, and thank you for including More than Coffee. 🙂 I can see this poem as the beginning of a book. So, I’ll have to watch for it in the future. 🙂
    Happy New Year, and may this year bring an abundance of inspiration for more creativity! Love and hugs! xoxo

    1. Lauren, bless you for your wonderful comment and I must agree that I was not ready to finish the story yet and could see this working as a longer piece. I’ll see …

      It’s great you enjoyed the story and your book was a joy to read last year and has stayed with me – its title is inspired and slipped its way easily into the poem.

      Likewise, wishing you a wonderful year of writing, launching new books and always reading! hugs xx ❤️

      1. Thank you so much Annika, I appreciate your kind wishes. Let’s hope 2024 is one that is more of love and peace that is kind to all of humanity… God’s blessings, my friend. 🙏💕

  9. This was such a fun way to share the books you read this year, Annika. You weaved it so beautifully together, I couldn’t guess they were the names of books. I’ll keep this as a reference for my reading list this year.
    I enjoyed ‘My evil mother’ very much 🙂
    Wishing you a wonderful 2024 and loads of reading.

    1. Smitha, thank you so much and it was a fun story to write. At one stage I did wonder whether to highlight the names of the books but I’ve left them normal and let the reader guess! 😀 Oh, Atwood is such a superlative writer and ‘My Evil Mother’ was a treat to read and I just loved the ending! All the best for 2024 & Happy Reading! 📚

      1. I loved it and I hope to do it for my 2024 reading😃. I loved the ending, too in ‘The Evil Mother’. I’ve been telling my girls to read it. I don’t mind being called ‘the evil mother’ at all. Lol. Wishing you the very best for 2024 and loads of good books.❤️

    1. Many thanks, Andrea and it is fun to return to my year of books in this way! Hoping you’re having a gentle and good start to the New Year and wishing you a peaceful and harmonious 2024!

    1. Curt, it’s great you liked the intro and it hooked in you into the story. Those first few words and first two sentences are critical, I feel! Thank you so much for your lovely wishes – likewise wishing you and Peggy a wonderful year filled with adventures and light! All the best to your family too!

  10. Oh WOW, Annika! This a beautiful and well crafted piece that blurs the line, as it reads both as a poem and a story. Now, I know what you’ve been up to, READING. 🙂 And oh, I did a double take as I saw my book among works of these accomplished authors; a wonderful way to start the year. Thank you very much for reading and being so generous with your time. I really appreciate. xx

    1. Busted! 😂😂 Khaya, it was been a wonderful year of books and your poetry book is exquisite and thought-provoking as ever! Thank you so much for your wonderful comment. As I wrote I noticed the piece was between short story and poem. I tried to re-write to a pure short story format and it seemed to lose its immediacy so returned to the original. I’m glad you feel it works well – it’s fun to play around with writing at times!

  11. Wow! What an awesome poem! You are incredibly creative to weave all of these book titles together in such a marvelous way. It is a wonderful story as a stand-alone without knowing your book title agenda! Wishing you a wonderful new year, full of books, writing, and creative pursuits!

    1. Linda, thank you so much for your wonderful comment about my poem story and it’s great you feel this works as a stand alone too – something I very much wanted to achieve. Thank you also for your lovely wishes and likewise may 2024 be filled with light, laughter, good health, books and creativity for you!

    1. Shushmita, glad you were almost caught up in the web – and I did wonder whether to highlight the challenge at the start but felt this way caught the reader’s attention promptly … then the explanation! So glad you enjoyed the story and many thanks for the follow – I’m following you back! 😀

    1. Betsy, it was fun to weave the titles into this story – I was aiming for at least 20 and managed just a few more! As you can tell, I love reading and can’t seem to stop! 😀

  12. Wow. That was awesome, Miss Annika. Loved that narrative. This sounds like a novel you can create of your own. I specially liked, “He saw me before I saw myself.” Blessings to you in the new year, sweet lady.

    1. Lori, wow! Thank you so much and must admit that I didn’t want to stop writing the story – I agree, it could definitely be expanded to a longer piece. Now, a novel might be a stretch ..! 😀 I love that you picked out that line -after writing it the sentence struck me particularly too! Sending much love to you for a peaceful 2024. xx❤️

    1. Teagan, I hope when you write ‘your own story’ that this is fiction too – it is too dreadful to comprehend otherwise, especially the betrayal of someone you trusted so much and saw as a saviour. Thank you I’m having a gentle start to the New Year and all fine… so far! 😀 Wishing you well and everything good for 2024! xx

    1. Books are a blessing and I can’t imagine a life without them! However, 80 was a bit of a stretch especially since some were very long indeed. It’s great you liked the poem, Kamal – thank you very much & a very Happy New Year to you too! xx

  13. This is truly amazing and inspiring, Annika. I felt the resonance of your escape and rebirth. By the way, kudos on completing the Goodreads Reading Challenge with 80 books 👏🏼

    Wishing you a New Year filled with even more inspiring reads 💕

    1. Ritish, that’s great and thankfully this was a fiction piece – it’s wonderful Maggie’s escape and new found life resonated so strongly – just what I’d hoped the reader would feel! I have become quite addicted to these Goodreads Reading Challenges and they ensureI know what I’ve read and when!

      Thank you for your lovely New Year’s wishes – I am sure the books will be as inspiring as ever and this year I’m hoping to review more for Netgalley. Wishing you a peaceful and happy and creative New Year!

  14. Wow! That is a lot of books. I seem to only manage a few and some I forget. Would love you to read mine now it’s fully in print! It was a very busy year for me so I might try more this year!

    1. Georgina, you’ve had an incredibly busy year so I’m not surprised that you haven’t been able to read as many books as you would have liked. I hope 2024 settles down for you and you can find the time and peace to read LOTS! How exciting with your new book, congratulations and I very much hope to read it sometime this year – I’ve already added to my list of books to read. I’m delighted for you. xx

  15. Behind the Story's avatar Behind the Story

    You had me frightened for a while, Annika. But it was very clever. Well done. Now I’m going to go back and look at your list of books for some to put on my reading list. Thank you. Happy New Year.

    1. Nicki, hopefully not to frightened though!😀 This was a fun piece to write although I’m always a bit apprehensive at the start. Enjoy looking for some books to add to your list – it is great sharing about books here! Wishing you a very Happy New Year too!

    1. Thank you so much, Natalie and it was great to be inspired by the book titles! In these troubled times I just had to end it with hope and light for Maggie. Wishing you a wonderful year of adventures, travels, writing and yes, always books! Xx

    1. Layla, thank you so much and I thoroughly enjoy sharing some of my books from the year in this way … before I start the piece I have no idea where it will take me! Lovely to be surprised! 😀

  16. Storytelling about stories at its finest Annika. Great story encompassing the books you’ve read. Congrats on your challenge, and may 2024 bring all good things for you. ❤

    1. I do like returning to my read books over the year in this way and sharing here! So glad you enjoyed the story, Debby and thank you for your kind words. Wishing you peace and light this New Year, my friend. Xx ❤️

  17. 80 books that is a lot. I read 50. Maybe I’ll read more books this year. That was a very intense poem. Profound and captivating and I was so impressed that you were able to incorporate the book titles in the poem.

    1. Thomas, I must admit before I start I’m always daunted by the prospect of how to incorporate the book titles in a story. I make sure to have the list in front of me, scan through the titles a few times and once I have the first sentence it almost seems to write itself! It’s great you found it captivating and thank you for your lovely comment. Fifty books is a lot too and I’m hoping to read that in 2024. You are very diligent with your superb reviews and sharing them online – very impressive and a great help for all authors & readers!

      1. Thank you so much Annika. Yes incorporating book titles like you did seems daunting. I don’t think I could do it. Unlike most people I write reviews for most books I read but on my blog I only post kind of reviews Leonberger/dog books (good and less good) and then the books I like the best and want to promote (any gendre). Most book reviews I don’t post on my blog.

    1. What a terrific idea and I’ll make a note and try to remember that! Check out this space in 12 months time! 😀 Happy New Year and may it be filled with good things – including of course, reading lots! 📖 📚

  18. Your poem is enticing me to further explore the books cleverly mentioned within. While your book list may be part of your 2023 finale, it is a great list for me to explore in 2024 for my next couple of reads! Any suggestions on which might be considered first?
    BTW: I noticed Khaya’s collection of poetry/essays in the mix!
    🙂
    It’s so good to hear your voice again, dear gentle Annika – welcome back.
    hugs

    1. Dear Laura, thank you so much for the warm and kind welcome back; it means so much to me. ❤️

      Now, you set me a challenge and I’ve enjoyed trying to narrow down a few books to recommend for you. For poetry Khaya’s is exquisite and Lauren’s short stories and poetry heartwarming and life-affirming.

      For novels the following are some of my favourites and that made a huge impact on me: There is a light that does not go out, To the bright edge of the world, Lessons in Chemistry, The Silence Project, The Family Tree, The Lost Notebook … to name but a few! I’m afraid I couldn’t cut it down to just a couple! I would love if you shared some of your recommendations for me to read this year – as you can tell I love sharing all about books!

      Happy Reading … isn’t it a huge blessing! Hugs xx

      1. Because I had little to zero luck with the fiction I culled from the local library shelves in 2023 (I ended up not finishing most of them!) – I re-read a few of my own favorites just to have something to read! That’s why I am thrilled you have passed on to me 6 already-vetted-by-yourself book titles from which to choose. Thank you so much Annika.
        Two of my re-reads for you to consider: “The Secret Life of Bees” by Sue Monk Kidd and the classic “The Wind in the Willows” by Kenneth Grahame
        The few I absolutely did love and can recommend to you are as follows:
        After reading the non-fiction “The Soul of an Octopus – A Surprising Exploration into the Wonder of Consciousness” by Sy Montgomery during the Pandemic, I was drawn to a novel featuring Octopuses as a character element in the storyline called “Remarkably Bright Creatures” by Shelby Van Pelt. Both are excellent and both I discovered at the bookstore and not the library!
        The other two I can recommend are – “Down by the Riverside (a Shady Grove Mystery) by Jackie Lynn and “Someone Else’s Shoes” by JoJo Moyes.
        So there’s my 6 to match your 6!
        😎
        BTW: I read/bought Khaya’s “The Sheltering” fresh off the press – her best collection to date IMHO! 🙂

        1. Laura, such wonderful books! I’ve read this one by Sue Monk Kidd and loved her The Invention of Wings but see there are others I haven’t read yet – thank you for reminding me of this wonderful writer. Oh, The Wind of the Willows is one of my childhood favourites and we have quite a number of versions in the house. Your other suggestions sound great and I’m noting all these down. Haha! Yes, book shops are the go to place for finding books but then at times I try to order them from the library. For popular ones there can be quite a waiting list – I was once #64 in the queue!😀 Happy Reading! ❤️

            1. She’d approve of our home in that case! 😀 Bookshelves crammed with books in nearly every room! I’ll have to find myself a copy of this book. My son and his girlfriend have it and I always end up glancing through it at their place! Many thanks for the reminder. Xx

        2. Am looking forward to trying the octopus fiction too. A fascinating list. It is a shame that some library shelves are not full of a range of fiction. Guess funding is key. And more of us might need to ask for books to be ordered. But there is nothing like a browse in a bookshop and finding gems.

    1. Thank you so much, Kymber! Congratulations on all your books this year – 103 quite a feat … I tried to leave a message without success. Happy Reading in 2024 and do you dare aim for 150 books as mentioned?! 😀

    1. Brad, thank you so much for your lovely comment and wishes! It’s great you enjoyed the story and it is a lot of fun to create as the story almost seems to write itself! Wishing you a peaceful and harmonious New Year!

  19. That was great fun to read, Annika, especially when the titles of the books started popping out at me. Aha! You had a great year of reading and I hope 2024 is just as full and rewarding. Happy New Year!

    1. Diana, I know what you mean, I’m imagining the book titles pulsating from the screen as you recognised each one! As always I cannot imagine a world without books and the ability to read – a blessing and one I make the most of each day. My Kindle has lots of more books ready for 2024 and some hardback which I received for Christmas. Can’t wait! Wishing you and yours a very Happy New Year! xx

    1. Well, it was New year, Jacqui and I just couldn’t make it a dark start – enough of that in the real world at the moment! It started as a short story poem but then the formatting of WP seemed to create this poem layout – works okay, I thought so left it!

      Haha! My studio is for writing and work – I cosy up in the house, garden or during travels etc for my reading! It’s lovely you still remember my studio – do you have anything similar for yourself?

      I was happy with my 80 books last year but pales with your astounding 177. Congratulations! 👏

    1. Neil, I couldn’t imagine a life without books and just love reading – as you can tell!😀 I’m glad you’ve found a few books that interest you – it’s great to share all about books in this world of blogging! Happy Reading and wishing you a great 2024!

    1. Pat, the story just came to me as I wrote the title My Evil Mother and liked the way it led to darkness. The book itself is a superlative short story which branches off in most unexpected directions. Oh, what a tragic story about Gypsy Rose and that she served 85% of her prison sentence before being released. I just cannot even begin to fathom parents abusing children.

      In the New Year’s Honours list this year the King a nine-year-old boy became the youngest ever to gain an award. Tony Hudgell was awarded the British Empire Medal (BEM) for services to the prevention of child abuse. He lost both legs due to injuries inflicted by his birth parents, who were jailed for 10 years in 2018.

  20. Dear Annika, I agree totally with Selma. Your story is wonderful.
    in poetic prose you have created a story of beauty from lines in the books your read. It bewitches me and fills me with joy.
    I have actually read all these books and loved them too. Your way of presenting
    them is quite unique and created a new beauty.
    Thank you so much.
    I would like to say a welcome back as you have been missed.
    Miriam xx

    1. Miriam, thank you so much and one of the joys in this community is sharing our love of the written word, the books and their authors. I love how you see a new beauty created from the beauty of the original books and their titles. Thank you so much for your wonderful comment and it touches me deeply that you find the poem story bewitching! I really appreciate the warm welcome back; I’ve missed being here and hope to feature posts & read others more regularly this year.

    1. Thank you so much, Robbie and this was a lot of fun to write. Now, I wonder would it be possible to do one incorporating all 80?!😀 Wishing you and yours a happy and peaceful 2024!

  21. Oh my gosh! Spectacular of achievements! I couldn’t compete here. Not in the reading of these many books and not in the composition of such a stellar short story that made lots of sense as a stand alone. Wowed me soooo much kind lady. This is an endearing kindness. You’re one super talented creative. Thank you so much. Happy new year. 🥳 👏🏽

    1. Selma, bless you for your wonderful comment! I’m smiling away and I love how you see the ‘endearing kindness’ of the story – sums it up exactly! I’m glad you feel it works as a stand alone, I always try to make sure it doesn’t feel forced and such fun to weave in the book titles here! Thank you for your uplifting words and wishing you a very Happy New Year too! xx

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