PARALLEL LIVES

The first time I met myself was a few years ago. Once again this Easter, after a  day of travelling, I arrived at last at the houses in the midst of the forest. And there I was! As if I’d never been away! A disconcerting sensation, a time-shifting eclipse. As if my conscious self in the UK had been switched off, just as the awareness of my Swedish self powered on.

It was as if I’d walked this gravel road every day, not just for the two weeks over Easter. One spectacular afternoon I witnessed the sun searing through the trees.

The forest itself proved startlingly alive, alluring; the air brimming with oxygen, the colours clear and vibrant. Certain events, unknown to my Swedish self, reminded me that I had not been there after all. When did the big fir tree topple down? Or rather break away as a neighbour later pointed out, the top half cracking away from the main trunk, to land neatly in the birch copse. 

By the coast the combination of sea, sky and rocks struck me anew, the views intoxicating, like a punch of joy to my heart. My other self had let me down, let me forget this body blow of beauty.

The blues all around were broken up by the array of colours of the rocks, the stark trees, the dainty flowers growing in the granite cracks.

Here and there people had contributed to the enjoyment with a sense of fun creating a child’s seat set amongst the rocks.

The two weeks were filled with overwhelming joy, laughter, conversation. Where walks transformed into meditations, where books became all-consuming, where thoughts sought and found clarity in the vastness of nature.

How could life be anything but this?

Yet I return home … my other home, to my other self. Yet the one in Sweden clings on to my spirit, not quite ready to release me from its hold, my soul swooping amongst the trees, across the waters.

I am here, yet there. I’ll never forget standing on the deck on Good Friday, gazing at the full moon in all-consuming awe of epiphany. The pink aura transported across space to minuscule us! The magic of the cosmos captured in a finite second. There am I, part of the wilderness, here am I, longing to return.

“We carry our homes within us, which enables us to fly.” John Cage

134 thoughts on “PARALLEL LIVES

  1. Bette A. Stevens says:

    Thanks so much, Annika. As for MY MAINE, the paperback is ready to go and will be released very soon; still formatting the eBook, which should be on pre-order at that time. ❤ Thanks for asking, my friend. Have a lovely week! xo

  2. Sheila says:

    Beautiful words and photos and your first line really made me smile. It’s so true that nature helps us find ourselves. I hope you’ll keep finding yourself surrounded by such beauty.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Sheila, warmest thanks for your delightful comment and reflections … being surrounded by nature is a blessing for the spirit and since this is a place I often visit, it is one intensely familiar to me! I think maybe we leave more of us behind when travelling than we realise and then are surprised to meet ourselves again! 😀 Wishing you a lovely weekend!

  3. Tiny says:

    Beautifully written, Annika. You express so eloquently some of the feelings I also experience when at home. For me it’s two-fold, Stockholm in Sweden and our forest in Finland…the other life. I am happy your spirit was renewed over the Easter break in this wonderful environment.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Helen, thank you so much for your lovely comment and you know exactly what I am writing about here! 😀 It is amazing how easy one can shift oneself and spirit into the different places immediately on arrival! Stockholm is an amazing and magical city and I imagine the forest in Finland is not too different from Sweden although maybe more remote. Here’s to celebrating the various ‘lives’ in all these places. 😀

  4. Forestwood says:

    It is always fascinating to read of another’s innermost thoughts, Annika, particularly about places dear to one’s heart. I can only begin to imagine the heartache of having a piece of yourself in two countries, although I do like to think I have an inkling. When I was growing up, I thought Australia was the best country in the world and could not understand anyone wanting to live anywhere else, until I went to Scandinavia and fell in love with my ancestral homes. I would live there in a heartbeat, but my family is here in Australia.
    I so enjoyed this descriptive post and the visions of the breathtaking natural beauty that manifested as a, ” punch to the heart!” The moon photo capped off a lustrous post, and left me trying to work out where in Sweden it might be. I was just told, it is a “blue” moon this coming weekend apparently! Two full moons in a month. An auspicious occasion.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Amanda, thank you so much for your lovely comment about the post and my writing! 😀 I had no idea about the blue moon until you mentioned it and have enjoyed reading up about the occasion. – auspicious indeed! The moon photo was taken only twenty minutes from the west coast of Sweden about a hundred miles north of Gothenburg. The beauty of the area honesty hits me like a physical punch to the heart … I just feel overwhelmed with joy!

      Wow! I loved learning about your Scandinavian roots and how wonderful that you’ve had a chance to visit the country. I find quite a few places have drawn me to them dearly, but here I feel a particular affinity and being a regular visitor over many weeks each year I experience this duality. I’ve grown up in England and this is very much my home though and with my closest family here I couldn’t envisage moving away permanently.

      Hope you had a lovely weekend (did you see Australia in the Eurovision?) We always have a big party with family and friends for the evening of music! Have a great week ahead! 😀🌺

      • Forestwood says:

        Hi Annika, Scandinavia is the best place in the world for me, but here I am in Australia. I am Australian so whilst I would be happy there, I habe only ever been there on vacation perhaps permanent life with all its duties and responsibilities would smear the perfect image, I have in my mind?
        I watched a fair bit of Eurovision this year. Sometimes we have parties here too. The event is quite popular in Australia, but I still feel ambivalent about Australia being in the competition at all. It feels wrong somehow.

  5. Julie Holmes, author says:

    Love, love, love this! Pictures and musings both. What a wonderful way to spend your Easter holiday. And I can definitely see why you would leave part of yourself in Sweden in that wonderful landscape. Thank you for sharing this with us, Annika!

    • Annika Perry says:

      Julie, thank you so much for your wonderful comment – I love how you love the post! 😀 It was an amazing Easter break (but sure seems long since we were there!) Oh yes, my other self is still there, enjoying wandering on the land, absorbing the stunning nature … just waiting for me! A delight to share here … and maybe more after my summer holiday! Hope Spring is well and truly with you – and look forward to reading/ seeing your garden photos! hugs xx

  6. watchingthedaisies says:

    What a thought provoking post Annika. I love all your photographs. Sweden looks so beautiful and natural. A perfect place to recharge your batteries.
    I always felt that Ireland was my real home when I lived in Scotland. I am thankful to live here now but I shall be returning to Scotland this summer for my nieces wedding. Looking forward to it.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Brigid, Sweden is incredibly beautiful and these photos give just a hint of the forest landscape, the coast is stunning! It is a heavenly retreat of sorts, away from wifi, TV; living amongst the vastness of nature. The coast is close by as is a lake and luckily lots of friends and family not too far away. I come home rejuvenated, my equilibrium restored!

      How interesting that you always felt Ireland was your real home! We never know where our inner connections will lead us. On my travels to Ireland, it is a place I could easily relate to the people and the landscape is amazing. Have a wonderful time back in Scotland and may the sun shine on the day of your niece’s wedding! 😀

  7. Libby Sommer says:

    the call of home. your two homes. beautifully expressed. two fabulous weeks over Easter. reminds me of the T.S. Eliot quote: “We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.”

    • Annika Perry says:

      Libby, I LOVE the quote … it speaks straight to my heart! Beautiful! There are certain moments in life when one feels absolute clarity and enlightenment – almost a mystical experience! Your first sentences sum up the post perfectly!😀

  8. Bespoke Traveler says:

    Having visited various parts of Sweden, I too have felt a part of that wilderness and as if I was living in an entirely different world while in the rural portions of the country. I love how you juxtapose your other self and your other home and that constant yearning of being between two homes. Beautiful.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment and how true that the huge contrast in location plays a key role in the duality feeling! I love that you too have experienced the wilderness of Sweden, even more so in the far north of the country, if I’m not mistaken. Here in the UK, I live in a quiet country village but still the immensity of space, the stunning walks are not on the doorstep as in Sweden. There is indeed a yearning between the two homes – I realise how lucky I am to have the chance to live and feel like this, and instead of trying to make sense of it, just accepting the emotions!😀

  9. Mabel Kwong says:

    What a lovely place to visit where you found yourself. It sounds like it was like coming home, a place where you’ve always longed to be. I think I get what you mean: being in a place like that can feel surreal and even after you’ve left, you also still feel very much surreal. It can be a feeling of belonging so hard to describe, yet it feels so right and so very real although surreal. Beautiful images of your trip. May you return at some point and in the meantime, feel at home where you are 🙂

    • Annika Perry says:

      Mabel, you describe it perfectly and totally understand my confusion! Surreal is definitely the word … writing about it this time I’ve found the key is to embrace both realities … feel at home in each and know the other me is waiting there to greet me! 😀 We go back a few times in the year and this summer will be out there for a number of weeks! I’m so glad you liked the place and photos of it – it’s nestled beautifully in the forest but not far from the lake or coast! Heavenly! Happy Weekend! 🌺

      • Mabel Kwong says:

        Two places where you feel comfortable is amazing. Hope you enjoy your trip and stay there this summer. May the weather be kind to you so you can enjoy the lake and coast 😀

  10. restlessjo says:

    The blues grabbed me! 🙂 🙂 This is a time of year when many who have homes elsewhere are returning for the summer, Annika. It’s a strange thing for me, not to belong anywhere else.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Jo, it’s almost the blue from your photos in Portugal… you can’t beat that mix of blue sky and sea – always intoxicating! I understand how it must be strange to watch as the summer visitors return when you’ve been there all winter … but you will always have England as your home as well, even if no the physical manifestation of a building! Hugs ❤️

    • Annika Perry says:

      Barbara, the country is just so beautiful and I just have to lift up my camera and snap away! 😀 I’m glad you can sense the draw of the place and enjoyed my description of this emotion … I think life is lived so intensely here in the UK and in Sweden so both are so real and true!

  11. roughwighting says:

    I know EXACTLY what you’re talking/writing about here, Annika, and you write it so well, so understated in some ways, and yet in other ways, it shouts the joy of finding yourself in a place you truly belong, yet can only visit. Oh, my heart bumped and thumped as I read your words that joined how I feel. Here’s my blessing and my hope – that we can often and always visit the place where we reunite with our SELF. ❤

    • Annika Perry says:

      Wow! Pam, your words leave me speechless!😀 (Hence the pause before replying!) In such a warm and literary comment you capture my thoughts, intent exactly and my heart is beating with joy that my writing touches you so! Your blessing is heartfelt and heartwarming … in an increasingly fractured world may we indeed ‘often and always visit the place where we reunite with our SELF’. Hugs, my friend xx ❤️

  12. radhikasreflection says:

    “The two weeks were filled with overwhelming joy, laughter, conversation. Where walks transformed into meditations, where books became all-consuming, where thoughts sought and found clarity in the vastness of nature.” How lovely to spend time this way Annika…. loved your reflections on self, homes and the beauty of the places. Thanks for sharing this ….. truly enjoyed reading this beautiful write up ❤️

    • Annika Perry says:

      Radhika, warmest thanks for reading and your lovely comment – as you can tell I have had lots of time to reflect during this break, all whilst absorbing the beauty of nature around me! It been therapeutic for me to write this and an absolute to share here! Xx ❤️

  13. Khaya Ronkainen says:

    That quote by Cage is true and true. And you capture so beautifully the duality of an immigrant life, at least, I consider myself one, with these lines “Yet I return home … my other home, to my other self.

    I feel this way each time I leave one of my homes to visit the other. Am I here? Am I there? I have two homes; both a blessing and a curse! 🙂

    • Annika Perry says:

      Khaya, your last sentence sums up the duality perfectly, both a blessing and a curse – I totally understand what you mean. One’s spirit is in a state of flux upon returning and the confusion before stabilising can be hard …yet one would never be without the experiences of the other home! Reading your word immigrant I realise I never consider myself as such, having grown-up in the UK, although this is technically true. Both places are home and who says you can’t add more along the way. I wanted a quote to accompany the post and Jon Cage’s sums it up exactly! Happy and safe travels between your homes … and to it ultimately residing with us! 😀

    • Annika Perry says:

      Thank you, Clare and yes, it was so tough to leave after such a special time! I’ve finally landed back home here in England and it was wonderful to see the glorious garden … the lilac trees full of flowers!

  14. Christy B says:

    Oh Annika, how blessed you must feel to have “home” in two places like this xo I can see how that daily walk became like a meditation for you. A lovely Easter from the sounds of it. I hope your May is one that brings more love within your spirit!

    • Annika Perry says:

      Christy, it indeed a blessing to have two places to call home and it’s been a matter of me being unnerved by how both are so real to me … now I’m enjoying the sensation and realising how lucky I am. Walks here are so liberating, and it is easy for them to fall into meditation. Pure magic and rejuvenating. Thank you so much for your lovely comment, Christy, both here and on twitter … they mean a lot to me. Wishing you a wonderful May filled with joy and laughter. Xx 😀

  15. delphini510 says:

    Dear Annika,
    I saw you wrote about the upset of losing so many comments. Knowing you, you had put yourself and time into them. As I was one you approached for test I went in to my SPAM folder at My Site.
    Hold and below.
    There I found this one and approved it.

    I suggest all your blog friends affected try the same.
    hug
    miriam

    • Annika Perry says:

      Miriam, thank you so much for rescuing my comment and letting me and everyone know here! 😀 It was an odd day as all my comments made during the whole day disappeared, if it had been just one or two I would have assumed they’d gone to spam. With so many ‘gone’ I panicked, contacted WP, and then through comments or twitter contacted the people I could remember answering. The upside has been a chance to have a chat to everyone and all of us having a bit of a laugh at the vagaries of WP! 😀

    • Annika Perry says:

      Robbie, it definitely was … this time more so than ever before! 😀 I feel a inner calm, strength and certainty. Have a lovely weekend and look forward to reading about your busy weekend exploits! X

  16. JC says:

    Anika, I almost went to bed but something told me I needed to check my mail and I’m glad I did for I would have missed the best words I’ve read in months or all year, excellent writing.

    Now I can say I’ve been to Sweden for your words have taken me there… jc

    • Annika Perry says:

      Wow! 😀 I’m glad you checked your mail too! Thank you so much for your wonderful comment, JC. As always, I wrote from my heart, and once I had the first sentence the rest flowed quite easily. So glad you’ve now experienced a bit of Sweden, albeit through these photos and my words! 😀

    • Annika Perry says:

      Carol, the full moon night was stunning and I felt an ethereal calm sweep over me whilst viewing it … one which I tried to capture a sense of in this photo! Ahh … love how you use my words to describe how the post touches you! 😀 That great! Thank you so much and wishing you a lovely weeknd! Xx🌺

  17. rijanjks says:

    This is a most beautiful post, Annika! What an incredible feeling to return to a place where your soul obviously resided sometime in the past. I love the photos, but the experience is what touched me! Wow! Thank you for sharing!

    • Annika Perry says:

      Jan, warmest thanks for your wonderful and heartfelt comment… It means a lot to me to know how this post and the experience touched you. It’s a sensation that’s swept over me for many years but one that I’ve never written about before … neither for myself nor on WP. I was shy to share at first but comments such as yours convinces me it was the right decision. Thank you! Wishing you a peaceful weekend. Xx

  18. Vashti Q says:

    Beautiful, Annika! No matter how comfortable we are in our lives, part of us always clings to our roots and the motherland. Although I was born and raised in the U.S. when I visited Spain for the first time I felt at home. Although I had never been I felt a sense of belonging. ❤ xo

    • Annika Perry says:

      Vashti, how lovely to learn about your Spanish heritage! 😀 Is your name Spanish … it’s such a lovely name but for us here in England unusual. It must have been an emotional visit for you on so many levels and how wonderful that you felt an immediate sense of belonging. I’m finding that I’m embracing both elements of my two lives more and more … and in the process finding inner peace and self-awareness! Here’s to our roots and our present selves! ❤️ Xx

      • Vashti Q says:

        Vashti is an unusual name in the USA as well. It isn’t Spanish, it is actually Persian and in the old testament of the Bible. My mom saw the name in the book of Esther, in the Bible and chose the name for me. I hated my name growing up because people had a difficult time pronouncing it (although it’s just 2 syllables) and remembering it. As a kid, I just wanted to fit in and be just like my friends and I felt that my “strange” name made me seem different. I began to appreciate the uniqueness of my name later in college and as an adult. Yes! Cheers to our whole selves! ❤ xo

  19. Jacqui Murray says:

    What a wonderful opening–meeting yourself, switching part on another part off. I’ve never felt that but I can see what you mean. I would love a self that understood nature as well as you do.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Jacqui, I’m so glad you enjoyed this start to the post … I knew I wanted to write about my experience but until I had a beginning I couldn’t write any more;once the first sentence came to me, the rest fell into place. Oh, nature has always been a huge part of my life, from Sweden, from growing up near the moors and nearly every day heading our for walks, exploring the fields and woods with friends on endless summer evenings! I think it’s just become a vital part of my being over the years … I know I wouldn’t cope well living in a city! 😀

  20. Mary Smith says:

    A beautiful post, Annika – and photos. As I read your first two sentences I recognised exactly what you were saying. I lived in Karachi for three years and loved this huge, noisy, dirty city. After I moved away, whenever I returned it was like coming home. And there I was. I am sure I’m still there, waiting for me to come back.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Mary, your last sentence resonates deeply with me … and it’s comforting to know others feel the same; as your other self is still waiting for you somewhere else – and in your case Karachi! Two such vastly different places, but I think deeply intense lives feel so real in both places, as if they’re always there! I am in awe, but after reading one of your books not surprised, how you coped and enjoyed living in such an overwhelming city … you have much more to write about your time there, I imagine! 😀

  21. Behind the Story says:

    A beautiful poetic post. I recognize your love for nature in this post and your sensitive soul. I, too, have experienced being two people. For a couple of years I lived in two places, a suburb of Seattle and an apartment in Manila. Traveling back and forth, it was as though lived in two separate worlds and I was a different person in each of them. I liked the sensation of having two lives.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Nicki, thank you so much for your kind words and for sharing a bit about your dual lives! Manila and Seattle are two very different cultures, worlds and it must have been amazing to experience both. Up to now I’ve been disconcerted with this feeling of two lives but realise, that as you do, I should embrace it and enjoy the sensation. It is a gift to have not just one place that feels like home but many!😀

    • Annika Perry says:

      Warmest thanks, Balroop. 😀 It’s been a joy to share my thoughts and photos here … cathartic and enlightening in many ways! I’m so glad you enjoyed the post and the journey! Wishing you a lovely 1st May! xx

  22. Sharon Bonin-Pratt says:

    Annika, what an amazing experience, to be one person in Britain, another in Sweden, each comfortable in their “home,” each unique and rich with sensation. Your description of your two selves in their different locations made me realize how dependent we are on routine to stay grounded and feel safe. The photos are lovely – I’d love to walk along that road, among those tall trees, and peer up to see the blue, blue sky.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Shari, first thank you so much for your wonderful comment and your insight into the post and my selves! 😀❤️ I think I experience such emotions because of the routine of both home here in the UK and in Sweden … I feel equally grounded, familiar in both places. The same me but yet I feel so different. Instead of fighting this sensation I’m now becoming aware to embrace it! Oh yes, the walk along the road is stunning, in one direction leading to the top of a hill with views over the valley and further on to a small hamlet with a beautiful old stone bridge. Idyllic. It was amazing how the sky was that blue for over fourteen days in a row, particularly after the constant grey of winter in England! hugs, my friend xx

  23. Clanmother says:

    “We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other lives, other souls.”
    Anaïs Nin, The Diary of Anaïs Nin

    I enjoy your ability to weave storytelling into your posts. We are at our best when we see the magnitude of possibilities. All we need do is to reach out with courage and expectation. We are more than we think we are….

    • Annika Perry says:

      Wow! Rebecca, I love your comment and it is one I have read many times. Cosmic in scope … I also believe we are much more than we think we are but it’s a matter of daring to see this, finding that courage. I realise I’ve found this feeling of parallel lives slightly unnerving but now I’m accepting it on another level. 😀 Here’s to travelling and seeking! xx

  24. D. Wallace Peach says:

    A lovely post, Annika. I’m always amazed at the connections we develop to a place, set in a particular time. Returning is an act of time travel. I love your walks and reflections, and I’m glad a bit of Sweden came home with you. ❤

    • Annika Perry says:

      Diana, thank you so much for your warm and thoughtful comment. ❤️ I’ve often reflected that traveling resembles time travel (I was a sci-fi junkie as young so this was one aim in my life!!). It is astonishing how I feel I’ve never been away upon arrival … and that the previous months were fictional thoughts … and the same sense of reality comes over me upon my return home! This time and through this post, I’m realising it’s a matter of embracing these emotions, connections, selves. And yes, a bit of Sweden came home with me and I’m not letting it go! 😀

  25. Lori says:

    This is beautiful Annika. I’m so glad you were able to get away for a couple of weeks to find yourself . . . your other self. I can very much relate to this feeling, as I lived in Florida for 2 1/2 decades missing myself, my home. Since I returned, I felt like I’ve integrated the two me’s . . . the Florida Lori and the Chicago Lori. We are one now. Perhaps your Swedish Annika will find a place within British Annika to blend as one as well.

    Thank you for sharing this lovely musing and the beautiful photos of blue.

    • Annika Perry says:

      Lori, thank you so much for your lovely comment and for sharing about your two selves! 😀Florida and Chicago are also vastly different and I’m not surprised you also sensed the confusion of the two selves – your point about integrating the two has struck a chord with me. I’m glad this has worked well with you and I feel this time that by speaking and writing about my feelings that I’m finding that reconciliation and acceptance.

  26. smilecalm says:

    makes me smile seeing
    where you meet you
    in browns, blues
    & in-between
    rugged hues, Annika!
    i hope someday to have
    an experience of meeting
    my true selves 🙂

    • Annika Perry says:

      David, your delightful response leaves me smiling, capturing the essence of my post perfectly! 😀 With your deep spiritual self, I wonder if you haven’t already met your true selves along your life journey?

  27. Natalie Ducey says:

    This is truly divine, Annika! There is so much exquisite beauty and solace in your words and pictures. A soul awakens … a treasured gift. Thank you for sharing your journey with us. Amazing. XO

    • Annika Perry says:

      Natalie, thank you so much for your precious comment and comprehension – I’m deeply touched with your words and especially your description of ‘A Soul Awakens’. I’ve had these emotions before but never articulated them … rather accepting it as a necessary ‘downer’ of returning from a beautiful holiday rather than seeing the reason behind my feelings! hugs ❤️

    • Annika Perry says:

      Mae, warmest thanks for your warm comment and understanding … maybe it’s about time I have that understanding of self and home! 😀 So glad you enjoyed the post and photographs; I never tire of capturing the landscape with my camera and am thankful for digital photos – films were so expensive!

    • Annika Perry says:

      Janice, that’s great to read how captivated you were by the opening line and paragraph! I find that once I have these in place the rest of a post/story will fall into place – without it, I’m floundering! Thank you so much for reading and your comment – definitely a powerful and unnerving experience!

  28. delphini510 says:

    Annika, I am so taken by your beautiful post. The pictures that takes me to an almost different era, the clarity of the sky, mystique of the road winding through the forest, the colours of the rocks.
    Not to forget the awesome moon with the pink aura.
    ” There am I, part of the wilderness, here am I, longing to return “. your words encapsulate
    your strong feeling of belonging.

    You tell us about your experience in such a wonderful and poetic way. A song to the place you
    stayed.

    May the two parts of you continue to live happily together.

    miriam

    • Annika Perry says:

      Miriam, I’m deeply moved by your comment and insight into my post and myself. Your final sentence struck a chord with me as I try to reconcile the two parts of myself – I think they’re finding a way to live happily together! 😀 I love how you describe the photos almost as another era – it is just so! With so much open space, little traffic, crisp clean air and sparkling seas it is reminiscent of another time! And that is the huge pull!😀 I’m honoured you find my writing poetic and smiling at the thought of this as a song to the place in Sweden. Perfectly said … this was written from my heart as I reflected on the odd ‘meeting’ in the woods! Heartfelt thanks for your lovely comment – it means a lot to me! xx

    • Annika Perry says:

      Jill, thank you so much and glad to help make your start of day a lovley one! 😀 With views such as these I’ve had a great time snapping away … and now enjoy sharing & watching these as a slideshow at home! hugs xx ❤️

  29. Sue Dreamwalker says:

    What a beautiful post Annika.. Indeed we carry our homes with us.. And those skies, so Blue!.. the air so fresh, I wonder how you could bare to leave.. Stunning photos Annika.. Home is where the heart is… And I know a part of you never left Sweden and will always remain..
    Love and Hugs my friend.. ❤

    • Annika Perry says:

      Sue, thank you so much for your understanding and lovely comment. The skies were the most amazing blue every day! I felt I’d arrived in nirvana after the grey winter we’ve experienced. It was so tough to leave, not only for me. My son felt just the same although we’re both settled down at home now. You’re right though, part of me hasn’t left, just waiting for my return in the summer. How true that home is where the heart is – just that my heart seems to be in many places and splintered. Many thoughts whirling in my mind at the moment … hugs & love to you too. xx ❤️

      • Sue Dreamwalker says:

        You know Annika… Even though I have lived where I live now for more years than where I was brought up, when I return to where I was brought up in the Derbyshire Dales, I always say I am returning home..
        Yet even that lately, has not felt right for there is a greater home calling to all our hearts to remember where we are from..
        MUCH love and best regards to your talented son.. 🙂

    • Annika Perry says:

      Darlene, I think you must experience this even more as you spend equal time in Spain and Canada (I think). Have you found any tricks to help with the sense of dislocation or is it a matter of time?

      • Darlene says:

        I tend to spend more time in Spain, which is a much slower pace and each day blends into the next. When in Canada every minute counts and it’s go go all the time. I like both environments so I don’t have a problem flitting between the two.

        • Annika Perry says:

          Darlene, I think it’s a matter that I love both places, feel so at home in both that I’m confused which is the real me! It’s great that you have Spain for its slower pace in between the more hectic life in Canada – it’s a lot of flying for you though, I appreciate.

      • Darlene says:

        Not sure why the comment showed up twice, maybe you can delete one. I meant to mention that I often do feel like two different people. I like the parallel lives allusion.

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